Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Pet peeves

* Traffic behavior - Green by Induction: This is when vehicles assume a green signal for themselves because the vehicle ahead of them got a green. Very similar to how when you are pouring honey out of a bottle, one continuous viscous thread of honey keeps falling out even after you have willed it to stop. Similarly, one long chain of vehicles always has to keep on moving after the signal has turned red, as though all of them are part of one unbroken chain of vehicles joined at the bumpers. During peak hours, the last of the offenders usually end up stopping right in the middle of the intersection.

* Music: If you pluck out Nickelback's lead singer's vocal chords and examine them closely I'm sure you'll either find a stray splinter or a torn diaphragm. Whenever their songs come on the radio I feel like clearing my throat on his behalf.

* Impostors: Can people please stop calling Shakuntala Devi a mathematician?

* Mourning: I liked Vishnuvardhan. For a few hours after watching Suprabhatha as a kid, I thought it was cool to be a Petrol Pump attendant. I was sad to see him go. How does it give me an excuse for vandalism and arson? Here's my request to movie stars; please don't die, just walk away into the sunset. More coherent rant here.
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